【幽默方言故事】紹興方言 一雙皮鞋引發(fā)的誤會(huì)諱裔 <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;">注意：下面有兩種讀法</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 一、方言的讀法：就是把</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">藍(lán)色</span><span style="font-size:20px;">的字讀在一起，括號(hào)內(nèi)的字不要讀；</span></p><p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 二、普通話的讀法：就是把括號(hào)內(nèi)的字讀在一起，</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">藍(lán)色</span><span style="font-size:20px;">的字不要讀。</span></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 早在上世紀(jì)九</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">什</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（十）年代末，社會(huì)上正流行穿精紡羊毛衫，辦公室里進(jìn)進(jìn)</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">測(cè)測(cè)</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（出出）來(lái)做羊毛衫生意</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">咯寧</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（的人）絡(luò)繹</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">fe</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（不）絕。</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">噎苶</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（一天），有位黨灣</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">咯</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（的）羊毛衫供應(yīng)商來(lái)到</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">俄</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（我）們辦公室。</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">伊</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（他）四</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">什</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（十）歲左右</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">咯</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（的）年紀(jì)，打扮得清爽得體，可身上卻有</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">噎</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（一）股難聞</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">咯</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（的）臭味，正彌漫著整個(gè)辦公室。</span></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">嗾</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（坐）在</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">俄</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（我）對(duì)</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">頭咯</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（面的）同事朝</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">俄</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（我）使了個(gè)眼色，</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">俄</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（我）立刻會(huì)意，</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">伊嚡</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（她也）聞到了</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">噶</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（這）股氣味。</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">劃嗯扭</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（還沒有）等</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">俄</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（我）們開口，那位供應(yīng)商先說(shuō)</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">我哉</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（話了）：“</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">俄噶毛</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（我最近）得了</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">噎</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（一）種怪病，</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">身高頭老澀</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（身上老是）散發(fā)</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">測(cè)噎</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（出一）股莫名</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">咯</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（的）臭氣，走到</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">嚡</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（哪）里</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">駝戈</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（大家）都要遠(yuǎn)離</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">俄</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（我），</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">俄</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（我）四</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">區(qū)</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（處）求醫(yī)，卻都</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">撮fe測(cè)瑣咯</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（查不出任何）病因，心里</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">佬佬</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（非常）懊惱?！?lt;/span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">俄</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（我）們聞著</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">噶</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（這）股刺鼻</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">咯</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（的）臭味，雖</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">嚡擱</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（也覺）得有些惡心，但聽著</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">伊咯噎</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（他的一）番</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">我</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（話），頓時(shí)產(chǎn)生了憐憫之心。那老板</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">嚡fe</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（也不）好意思久留，待事情辦完后，很快就走</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">哉</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（了）。</span></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> 過了</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">噎</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（一）段時(shí)間，</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">伊依</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（他又）來(lái)</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">哉</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（了）。那天，</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">伊</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（他）身上</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">咯</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（的）臭味</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">嗯扭哉</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（沒有了），心情</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">嚡寺俕</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（也自然）好</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">哉</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（了），</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">伊</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（他）笑著說(shuō)：“上</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">毛</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（次）得了</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">噎</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（一）種怪病后，親朋好友都陸續(xù)來(lái)</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">屋</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（家）里看</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">忙俄</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（望我）。</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">噎苶</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（一天），</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">駝舅老爺兩婆佬</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（大舅子夫婦倆）來(lái)看</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">俄</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（我）時(shí)，</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">俄寧</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（我人）正好在外</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">頭</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（面）。</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">駝舅老爺擱</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（大舅子覺）得</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">fe</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（不）對(duì)勁，</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">我俄寧fe</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（說(shuō)我人不）在家，</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">屋</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（家）里</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">納格劃</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（怎么還）聞到陣陣臭味？于是</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">駝戈</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（大家）開始尋找散發(fā)臭氣</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">咯大胡</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（的地方），終于找到了問題所在。</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">噶</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（這）臭氣來(lái)</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">寺俄</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（自我）剛</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">馬咯噎</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（買的一）雙新皮鞋。原來(lái)</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">澀</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（是）皮鞋生產(chǎn)過程中，皮革發(fā)酵</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">fe</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（不）當(dāng)導(dǎo)致</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">咯</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（的），弄得</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">駝戈</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（大家）都哭笑</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">fe</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(25, 25, 25);">（不</span><span style="font-size:20px;">）得?！?lt;/span></p> <p class="ql-block"><span style="font-size:20px;"> </span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">噶</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（這）場(chǎng)“怪病”風(fēng)波，雖說(shuō)</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">澀噎</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（是一）場(chǎng)誤會(huì)，但卻</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">畀</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（給）辦公室增添了</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">fe</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（不）少趣味。那位供應(yīng)商</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">咯</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（的）遭遇，</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">嚡上俄</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（也讓我）們?cè)诿β?lt;/span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">咯</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（的）工作之余，多了</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">噎</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（一）份談資。</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">噶毛</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（如今）回想起來(lái)，依</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">俕擱</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（然覺）得</span><span style="font-size:20px; color:rgb(21, 100, 250);">什</span><span style="font-size:20px;">（十）分有趣。</span></p>